Little did I know on Dec. 18, 1997, as a 19-year-old Indiana University student, the reverberations that were coming when I sat down to watch my favorite show. That would be “Seinfeld” and the episode is titled “The Strike.” Colloquially, it has come to be known as the Festivus episode.
We’ll skip the deep background dive here and just point out — in case anyone is unaware — that a character named Frank Costanza (played superbly by the late, great Jerry Stiller) invented a winter holiday called “Festivus” (Dec. 23). It has elements such as the feats of strength, but, most importantly, the airing of the grievances. That is, you tell everyone all the ways they have disappointed you over the course of the previous year.
We actually do this at one of my family Christmases (I have 12 grievances on my running list right now, which I keep throughout the year on my phone’s Notepad app), but it can work anywhere. Let’s take it to my job!
It is time for the airing of the grievances, MLB style. I’ll do one for every team, as no one should be spared during our fictional Festivus Dinner. Each grievance will be me thundering away on something as I channel my inner Frank. Just to make it easier to follow, I’ll identify a target under each team, rather than a roster-wide grievance.
The teams are listed alphabetically.